HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY DEAREST GIRLF!
Finally you're the same age as us already:D

Now that everything's settled down, it's back to PW.

There's a first time for everything and there were lot's of first time for the boy.
First time taking neo print. And it's so hilarious okay!
A couple of weeks back, he wanted to take it in town. But upon seeing the pinkish place and with so many people, he freaked out.
So recently, we headed to Bugis and again he say he wants to take neoprints.
AND ALSO AGAIN, he freaked out when he saw the place and insisted we headed back to town to take cause there'll be lesser people there.

So I told him, 'Forget it, I ain't going to take neoprints with him anymore. He can go take with other people.'

Guess what? THAT SILLY HEAD GOT EMO JUST BECAUSE I REFUSE TO TAKE NEOPRINT WITH HIM ANYMORE! Geez, he suddenly became so moody and quiet I thought I said something wrong when I talked to him about other guys. Silly aye? Getting upset over neos. Tsk.

Also, his first time KBOX-ing. Sang ourselves silly for nearly 4 hours and he chose the most idiotic songs like 'BAA BAA BLACK SHEEP' -.- Hopeless nutcase. Why did I ever agree to go KBOX with him?

Anyway, I really want holidays to come like now! Just one more weeeeeek. Shawn's been texting me and IM-ing me so often these days asking me to quickly meet him. I also wonder how is FC dear doing in his BMT. He never did reply my text ):

So many things happened these days and like what Aks bestf puts it, I mia-ed for damn long xD
Ahwells. And of course, long overdue photos.




Retarded face aye?








Not bad right? Two hands two feet :D


He copied my pose. Tsk.


He says that he looks damn cute in this photo.


And still trying to ACT cute.


Taken by me the pro photographer.
Time: 10:11 PM

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& you know I'm sentimental. Everything we've promised each other, the hopes and dreams we had together. Going to uni together, living in my big big house.

The weekends we spend pigging out at home, you piggyback-ing me randomly making me laugh, waking up immediately when I sneeze and making sure I'm okay and properly under my blanket.

Tucking me in bed with goodnight kisses and switching off my room lights before you book into camp. Our little pig family with the daddy and mummy in your room and the kids in mine. The names we thought of to give our kids and the address we created so that we would meet each other in our dreams.

The times I thought you'd left me for good, when I thought you wouldn't turn back to find me anymore and you'd just leave me in the toilet crying, you still turned back to find me, to hug me and tell me everything's okay.

I don't know why we ended. I really don't know. After being apart for so long, I only remembered the good and not the bad. I guess like what you say, I was too young then and you were too immatured.

[/edit]
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Thanks especially to boyfriend and clement who's been there for me making sure I'm okay.
God, please bless their souls and watch over them. Watch over my parents too as they get over their grief.

A whole load of pictures to upload.
A new clutch, dress, necklace, belt.


Once everything is over, it's back to PW.
And I'll post the overdue pictures up tomorrow so check back tmr ya?
Time: 1:50 PM

I wrote a simple question on boyf's palm.

'Why do ppl die?'

And he replied, 'To go to a better place.'


I'm sorry for the lack of posts and reply of tags. Not in the mood yet.
And thanks to my PW group for understanding.
Plus the others who've made sure I'm all right.

Esp boyf, since I broke down in front of him a couple of times.
It ain't good. One's bad enough. Why two?


As they say, life and death are predestined.
Time: 9:39 PM

The ones who have watched you grow up and take you under their wings.


Dear Lord,

I pray for a miracle.


Amen.
Time: 8:07 PM

A hug that made everything back to normal.

I'm glad everything is a-okay now between the boy and I.
The whole morning of cold war nearly killed me but all's well now (:
PW PW PW Finally left with InR and OP.
After all the flustering and 'oh no' moments, it's OVER! BYE WR!
Geez. Can't wait for it to be over man.

Promised Grace tennis everyday.
Sam.T's coming my house to play.
And all the shopping I can do :D

And oh my, why are all the random guys calling/texting me on the same day?
- Royston (he texted me first with a good afternoon o.O)
- Hwee
- Xiong
- Derek
Geez, so random.

& I've finally met the girls in school like after so so darn long okay!
Boyf and I totally K.O-ed at my house for nearly 2 hours till my dad woke us up for dinner.
E.X.H.A.U.S.A.T.I.O.N
That smart ass, took my bed away, I had to sleep on the lower bed -.-

I still haven't started on my art. Smart eh?
Procrastination sucks. Hello shujun, start art yo?
Okay, I'm going to do up the measurements for my cloth alr.
I've got like 7m worth of new cloth and about another 5m worth of waste cloth from OM in sec2?
Nahahaha. Happy me.

So here's another picture to set the smile on other people's faces.


Time: 11:44 PM

Stay calm, stay focused.

First the coach, next the sport.
What more can the school take away to meet their selfish needs?
They think it affects the minority, no big deal.
Well I do care a great deal.
I love coach, I love bowling. Tyvm.
Bowled like shit today. Totally lost my focus the whole training.

Still, a big thank you to baby's hugs. Made me feel better though not much better.
And some random Malay guy smiled at me when I was on my way home.
Plus the Chinese Royston who gave up talking to me after I said I was attached.
Weird people. Mood out (in Sam's britishindia's words).

I'm off to do craft now. Hope it cheers me up.
Yes, I can get promoted but sometimes, I don't mind retaining.
At least I get to study one more year to make sure I know my stuff damn well?
I really don't mind.

Paranoia still lingers on. I can't help it.
And I know, when one day you get so sick of this paranoia,
it'll be the day I'd regret and blame myself for not trusting you.

Bruises on my leg before training- Ow.
Sprained ankle(s) during training - Double Ow.
Kneecaps giving way after training- Triple Ow.



Suddenly, I want roses to cheer me up so badly. I shall go buy myself a bouquet tomorrow.
The boyfriend's not going to be in town. So I shall be my own boyfriend.
Time: 9:52 PM

A pedicure, new heels, time spent with loved ones, what more could I ask for?
Grandma's on the fourth stage of cancer. Doc says she will have about half a year left.
It's scary to see people close to you passing on in life. Life seems so fragile doesn't it?

Tian's been a sweetheart accompanying me shopping, pedicure and it's just the girls' day out. Talking about everything and doing the retard-est things you can ever imagine.
I want another girls' day out, this time with Ying too.

Boyf's been a sweet tart too :D Especially today I don't know why.
There's training tomorrow. Can't wait. I'm so going to get a separate lane from him. -stares.
Life's so unpredictable and unexpected.
Who'd have guessed that he and I would get together?

Ah wells, miss the girls in school, miss the girls out of school.
Boyf can't take all my time away. I need the girls too!
AND MALCOM KONG FAN CHOU. WHERE ARE YOU!!!!
You never replied my text ):

Gazillion people asking me out already. But just no time. Holidays come quick please?
There's malcom, rafidah, jo, ying, tian, clement, derek, hwee, shawn, mt, school girls and a whole lot of other people I wanna spend time with.
And of course, the boy who'd pout if I don't include him in the fun.
The many things we wanna do like fly kite, blading, cycling and all the others.

No idea why I'm typing in short sentences.
Must be too tired. No pictures today.
And yes, some random guy called royston came texting me.
Freaky.
Time: 11:45 PM

GOOD LOVE :D

I've been so tired these days that I just K.O so early every night with my lights and lappy on. Geez.
And seriously, if my mum thinks that failing is a whole big deal and she sees no point in encouraging me then forget it.

She thinks I ain't up yet in the early morning so she said it so loud in the house that,

'Mingde told me that in her blog she wrote that I don't encourage her for her results. She still fail math leh. Keep telling her to do more math questions, give her tuition so she can pass math, in the end still fail. Fail leh, how you want me to encourage her?'

Seriously, I don't need your encouragement anymore? My many days of staying back to do math questions, nights staying up to do math, free periods and breaks to do math. I didn't even dare to concentrate much on other subjects cause I know math was my weakest? Not even history, my 2nd worst subject. The best was that, math and history paper were both on the same day. You think this is still not enough effort put in? Then forget it, I ain't going the whole world round just to please you.

Ask yourself lah. Since p4 onwards, you never encouraged me AT ALL anymore. Say I will get very low for PSLE, always comparing to korkor whose prelims got so high and my prelims got so low, say that if I can even get into Swiss Cottage it's a miracle already. In the end I still won korkor in PSLE, just missed by 1pt to get into RGS right?

Any encouragement from then on? No. Now that PSLE's over, threats to get me out of school came in. Prepared with a letter to give to the principal to let me drop out, keep calling my teachers, always telling me that I'm better off a drop out and stay at home than to let me go to school and study which is a waste of time. More threats to make me drop out of school. As usual, comparism to korkor saying how well he did in RV and how come I can't be like him.

Thank goodness I don't have to go through O levels or I'll just go through the same old crap I went through when I was having PSLE.

Now that I'm in NJ, yeah I screwed up IP1 cause of trainings and cause I slacked. But managed to pull my GPA up to a 3.2 from a mere 1.1 after working really hard. Encouragement? No. Rewards? No.
Oh sure, my mum will definitely say, I bought you a new hp or I bought you an iPod or whatever. You didn't give me those for encouragment and I know it damn well, that's just an easy excuse for you to say, 'HEY i did reward you in some way or another okay?' I'd rather have verbal encouragement or something seriously.

Seriously whatever I don't really care much about what my parents have to say already. They aren't the only people I can rely on. Thank goodness I had boyf, Clem, Sam.T, Jo and a whole load of other people encouraging me on, including Eug's mum who sent me a surprise text! Thankyou :D

Ahwells, yesterday boyf was sweet helping me drag the sewing machine to my mum's friend's house to fix it and see what's wrong. Okay the German Shepherd was so freaking huge and it stinks a great deal too but it was so obedient. Gah, such a good dog.

AND THE IDIOTIC BOYF TOLD ME NOT TO TOUCH HIM CAUSE I TOUCHED THE DOG AND THE DOG STANK! FINE LUH! Next time you go play bball or something or don't know what and you perspire and stink too, DON'T COME NEAR ME! Tsk.

I should make boyf attend sewing lessons with me too other than just sitting there and using his laptop -.- SEWING IS GOOD OKAY! Next time you go army you've gotta sew on your own badges and tags onto your uniform YOURSELF! Cannot keep asking your mum and grand aunt leh. 18 years old liao lor at that time. Tsk.

Ahwells, waiting for boyf to wake up now. Heading over to SimLim and Arab street for some shopping. Hurry hurry wake up. Geez, you promised me 10.30am ):


He looks so amused by the web cam.
Time: 9:54 AM

Gah, sometimes I really wonder what’s wrong with my parents. Yeah, they are bias towards my brother and I’ve grown used to it that I don’t really care that much anymore? Don’t say I’m being sensitive or what, but hey, look at the things he has after so many years. PS1, TWO PS2 (if I’m not wrong), PS3, Game Cube, Wii, new television and PSP. They didn’t even want to buy me a PSP at first okay? They told me to just borrow from my brother if I wanted to play it and I got so angry I just walked off.

Now here I am with results that aren’t good but with so much improvement and any form of congratulations or encouragement from them? No. Not even one.

Subject	Common test	Promos	Improvement	Overall
English Lit	D	C	1 grade	C
Mathematics	U	U	22 marks	U
Economics	D	B	2 grades	B
SEA History Int History	S S	C S	3 grades None	D
General Paper	E	C	2 grades	C

Okay I know my math is really bad still but think of it, with an improvement of 22 marks, it’s nearly a jump of 2 grades if I didn’t get U grade where the range is so big? Still, when I told my mum about it, all that she said was:

- What are your math results?

- Before that you fail right?

- Then now also fail right?

- All your subjects also all fail right?

- You need to go see principal to retain or not? Your results so lousy.

Seriously, you think I’m still motivated to do well? Well, actually I am la. I just want to get away from Singapore ASAP or something. At least I think I can get more encouragement in school than at home.

These few days I’ve been so tired that I hardly blog but here I am again :D

School has been okay here and there and nope, I can retain my 4 H2s. YAY!

There was training yesterday and I feel so home at OCC lanes. Maybe it’s because all my private trainings I had with coach that's why I'm so familiar with the lanes there.

Anyway, as promised, photos each day. Yawns. I'm so tired seriously.

AND YES! COLLECTION #1 IS NOW UP HERE!

Time: 10:53 PM

Been so tired these days.
Cam-whoring with baby's webcam is da bomb.
Visited my grandma and she's in a pretty bad state.
Wanting to do so many things but so little time.

Results are out tmr. Well all the best to everyone.
Let the pictures do the talking.
And boonlay's mrt station is bloody crowded?
It's as though fireworks display just ended or something =/





Okay, here are all the random webcam shots we took. I shall just post 10 today cause I'm bloody tired.










Time: 10:56 PM

I'm glad things are much better now. After the so many hours of 'cold war'.

Nearly overslept when meeting Clement. Gah, he spent like super a lot on me today I feel so bad ): But still, thankyou for spending the afternoon with me when I know you can be pigging about at home.

Baby has been coming over at my house for the past few days. Here are just some of the 'glam' shots of him:D






Time: 11:50 PM

Spell forever for me? It was just my wishful thinking.


The happy moments we had, the tears I shed, it was just seasons in the sun.
It just made me wake up to reality and to tell myself, 'life will never be a fairytale'.
Years of emotional turmoil I've had enough. Grow up girl.
You've had your share of good times now let others enjoy it too.
Some people just deserve better and I most certainly don't fit into the better side.

If ever I let this kite fly away, will it return?
Will it returned torn and tattered or with a brand new look?
I know how horrible I've been, I know how demeaning I am.
But it's just that, no one knows exactly why.

Only me, myself and I.
'I love you' are afterall, just words and nothing more.
I can live without them.


P.S. No gym tmr.
Time: 11:55 PM

Added this new dress to instocks. Geez, I seriously need to stop shopping online cause I buy new stuff then I don't like them and then I leave it in my closet.


This came in just yesterday and after I opened it, I didn't like it and thus, selling it away. It's pretty though and it's made of silk but just not my kind?

Ahwells, anyone who wants to purchase, just drop me a text or email or tag (:

Another thing up is handmade jewellery. Right now I have a few designs available. Due to time constrains I can only do these few designs as yet but once holidays are here, I'll start making more:D

Here is just a sample picture.


For more, visit HERE for more designs and pictures!

Bracelets prices range from $9-$14 (depending on the design)
Necklaces prices range from $14-$20 (depending on the design and also more beads are used)
Prices are subjected to change if the cost price increases or if the designs are more complicated and require more items.

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Anyway thanks baby for being so patient with me and so compromising especially after I start to sell things online. I love you.

Bowling was so bad that I finally gave up playing and went off. Geez. I'm so tired right now after doing the jewellery collection.
Right now, I've got four pairs of shoes to make and a couple of teeshirts to make.

Mummy's says she's going to ask her friend to teach me to make clothes. Is that cool or what? :D
Time: 2:27 AM

when your fingers just get so bored.


Visit HERE for customised sneakers (:

I'm still trying to find suppliers for clothes but it's so hard to find? Geez irritating.
I'm going to try making my own tops. Haha, fun fun. And maybe not sell so that I have the EXCLUSIVE piece. Okay, boyfriend thinks that I'm going crazy cause I wanna do so many things.

I think I'm going crazy about art&craft already too? Haha, after school headed down to Art Friend with baby to get some art stuff. He was bored stiff I tell you walking down the endless aisles of art materials and all but happy me still :D

Headed to his house for dinner and his mum sent me home after that. Yawns.
Thank you for today especially the endless walking and all the art shopping. Nahaha.
But that 'smart' boy, left my lappy on his couch and didn't bring it to the car with him.
So I'm using my desktop now. Ahwells. While my lappy is rotting at his house):

I feel lonely without my lappy. Gah.
Time: 11:38 PM

Just put yourself in my shoes, wouldn't you want to go back so badly?

Ahwells, Thank you boyf for like not freaking out. Haha.
Bad day today, like really bad day.
Ohwells.

Do visit www.buythehottest.blogspot.com! (:
Customised jewelleries and shoes will be up soon and new collections once I've found a supplier.
That depends when I'm free of course :D

So sleepy. Short post. Bye.
Time: 10:51 PM

& if one day I really can't smile anymore, it may just spell the end of this journey.


I just realised that boyf can sleep through the most major earthquake and not wake up?
He's been over at my house these two days and both days he totally K.O-ed?

Despite me shaking him, hitting him, poking him, talking to him (I must be crazy) and even THROWING things at him, he never even BUDGE?! The only thing that worked yesterday was when I throw the tissue box at him? Even the remote control didn't work -.-

LI QIANG! YOU OWE ME A DRINK THANK YOU VERY MUCH! AND IT IS A DRINK OF MY CHOICE:D Or you can give me 5bucks if you are too lazy to buy me my drink. I'll get it myself =P

Today I had to throw the tissue box at him 5 times before he finally MOVED then he dozed off again o.O GEEZ. Okay last night I had a totally horrible dream. I dreamt that I fell out with the girls and we saw each other in school but we just walked past each other without even saying 'hi!'

Damn scary okay ): Imagine not talking to the girls? Okay I haven't REALLY talked to them for a week or so. Scary scary. I gotta stop these stupid dreams.

Clement's first day of outfield is today and I'm so going to miss him. ANYWAY he said he'd sneak his phone for the outfield so he can text me at night. Yay! Kinda reminds me of the nights when he first went into the 2 weeks of BMT. Ahwells, sweet memories :D



I still haven't eaten the candy rose baby gave me for our anniversary. Gah, it's so pretty I don't wanna eat it ):
Sometimes I feel so spoilt and other times not. I'm weird.

I still can't wait for holidays to come. Imagine the whole day going out things.
I WANNA GO SHAWNNY SHAWN SHAWN'S HOUSE TO DRINK MY ABSOLUT VODKA LAH!
Can't wait can't wait can't wait. He's cursing and swearing already. HAHAH.
Time: 9:37 PM

Yesterday was a totally bad day. Didn't sleep the whole of Sat night, waited for boyf to wake up then went to meet him for lunch. Some things happened and I don't know why I'm so sensitive and such but I just don't like some things he say sometimes. But all's well now (:

Didn't sleep last night either. I can't remember what I was doing but yeah. Went to school in a total blur state. Geez. I see this really nice motorcycle jacket that's really nice. Should I get 'em? It's freaking $36 though. COMMENTS PLEASE!



Damn nice can! -heart melts.

Anyway baby's sleeping at my house now -.- Gah, gotta wake him up soon otherwise he's going to get scolding for going home late. It feels so relaxed now that exams are over. But we're getting back papers on Wed. Geez.

Peekchures!






Yummy pepper lunch?(:


Time: 9:43 PM